First off, well done on your purchase. No doubt you are mighty satisfied with your choice already 
1.) As Allen said, it's about practice. Keep at it and soon you'll be able to go over massive foamies. Check out the 2 photos below on a smallish foamie.
Unfortunately the photographer did not take the first photo. In that one, I would have (in this case) taken a hard vertical stroke on the right hand side, edged my right edge down and leaned back only a little, getting my weight forward straight away. The Element has a sharp nose rocker which makes it very easy to get over big whitewater. In a boat like the Nemesis, you'd have to lean back a little more. But again, getting your body to a neutral or aggressive (leaning forward) position right after that stroke! Very important. In this first photo you'll see my wrist cocked in a funny position and what I'm doing there is clearing the right blade from the water to immediately get it back into the water and forward again. This is vital, as in all apects of paddling, especially rivers. If you have a blade in the water, you are in control. Never forget that!!!

In the second photo I've got that right blade in again. This will either be a sort of a right stroke again or a draw stroke which acts as a brace. The water is very aerated in that foam and sometimes the stern will sink a little and squirm around. The blade in the water acts as a balance point and also helps keep you going forward. This way I don't lose my forward speed and can get out fairly quickly...

Also, paddle hard towards the approaching foam. Using this technique you can get over some pretty big stuff. I hope I've made it fairly clear. If you are in Cape Town, give me a shout. I'll gladly show you anything you want to know. Remember to check out my Essential Skills videos, they show stuff like draw strokes. Very important to have good technique. A good base knowledge will go a long way to improving your kayaking!
In the shot above I'm going over a larger foamie and this time my left blade is in the water (almost). Keep driving, and keep a blade in the water, preferably pulling slightly forward (although the water/energy of the wave) is going the opposite direction. Note my body position, I am still leaning FORWARD. You only lean backwards for a split second as the water hits your bow, then hard forward again.
2.) Take off either (depending), but usually (almost always) either left or right, depending on the wave. If the wave is very steep and hollow, you will fall out of the sky and catch your bow if you go straight... You will almost always take off going left or right. I often paddle towards a set wave (heading out) and turn either way as I read the wave and know which way it will break (this can take practise). I'll turn, using draw strokes and then change direction in, keep an eye on the wave and also other water users. Never drop in on somebody elses wave and know the right of way rules.
3.) How heavy are you? If you are quite light, raise the seat in your Element. This will give you more control over the edge of your boat. The edges are great and actually difficult to carve so hard as to get them to stall/break out. Essential Skills video volume I of mine shows edge control. Use your hips/knees and also your body. I have foam blocks under my knees so I can pull up on my knee and push down on the opposite, giving me fine edge control.
In the photo above, check out the body lean.
And again, not using the paddle as a brace, which I'll get into on your 4th question.
4.) Dragging your paddle in the water will SLOW YOU DOWN> this is bad. Use it only slightly, and check out the photos below. You must be able to carve without having your paddle in the water. One can use the trailing paddle blade to help stay on a steep wave as it acts like a rudder but don't use it as a brake, and definitely not as a brace, don't lean on it. If you're smart, you can use it almost like the fins on your kayak. Usually when dropping into a wave and holding a big bottom turn. Check it out below. Hope this all helps!
Spend a lot of time in the surf and paddle with other people who are better than you. See what they do. Watch the waves and learn from them. Watch for sets and learn to keep looking out for them. I often go into a brief bow stall to get a better view. This also gives you the edge over surfers as they are usually also around. Quietly paddle into position for a set. As you've probably noticed, sets are often quite different and take off points move around. Unless you're surfing a point break which you're probably not.
Last tips, respect other water users, smile and have fun. If it wasn't fun, we wouln't do it! DO NOT get angry with yourself. When you do that, the learning juices dry up. Enjoy the beatings (I do) and just have fun... Then you'll soon become more proficient. Any more questions just shoot...
Have a great weekend, I know I will! Time to see the missus! WOO HOO!!!
Cheers,
Adrian